If she was at all unstable on her feet, that might have been why she acted out the way she did, but a hungry child with or without a diagnosis like the one your son has is always tricky.
I do hope the doctors treating your son learn to listen to the parents better. I think the most awful thing in your story is how you and your husband knew something needed to be addressed and so many medical professionals ignored you.
It would have been easier for all of you if your son had been getting the help he needed when you first noticed something was not typical. I hope he has some smoother sailing and easier victories ahead.