This doesn't come across as an apology. Maybe your husband shares my view and that's why things continue to be stuck where they are.

You list all of the ways you hurt your husband, your marriage, and your children, but it seems like he is the one suffering all the consequences while you blithely write a listicle on Medium.

If you have time to do this, then you have time to do something concrete to help your marriage, like clean the fridge or get a job so you can redecorate the basement so it doesn't have to be the same shame room that you made it.

I don't know what you need to do, but I don't think this is it.